








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 682 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 478 matches | ||
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7136 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,099 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4610 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4721 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3398 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3370 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,490,192 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1420 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | artaxiann | 67% | 127 |
| #2 | DnT | 63% | 213 |
| #3 | You A QT ♡ | 61% | 107 |
| #4 | pio pio | 61% | 56 |
| #5 | weirdhoney | 60% | 166 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | sunny | 57% | 35 |
| #11 | Speedy | 56% | 43 |
| #12 | brinbran | 55% | 112 |
| #13 | Neosavic | 55% | 51 |
| #14 | Do_Worrk :) | 53% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BeltFedBird | 13 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Swag_Lured | 11 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | weirdhoney | 9 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | DnT | 8 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Hugh Janus | 6 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BeltFedBird | 780 | 0.12 | 20 min |
| #2 | DnT | 716 | 0.15 | 20 min |
| #3 | Hugh Janus | 683 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #4 | You A QT ♡ | 598 | 0.24 | 16 min |
| #5 | weirdhoney | 529 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | You A QT ♡ | +1.64 | 85 | 69 |
| #2 | pio pio | +1.46 | 70 | 58 |
| #3 | Hugh Janus | +1.20 | 82 | 68 |
| #4 | BeltFedBird | +0.97 | 64 | 56 |
| #5 | DnT | +0.91 | 67 | 64 |





