








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1247 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 734 matches | ||
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8743 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,368 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5370 | 20% |
| Smokes | 9300 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 4591 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 8107 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,406,398 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2710 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aidan.xi | 64% | 53 |
| #2 | You A QT ♡ | 61% | 296 |
| #3 | weirdhoney | 61% | 321 |
| #4 | trey | 61% | 46 |
| #5 | DnT | 60% | 364 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Vital | 56% | 112 |
| #11 | Neosavic | 52% | 65 |
| #12 | Hugh Janus | 52% | 287 |
| #13 | Speedy | 52% | 73 |
| #14 | brinbran | 51% | 138 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | You A QT ♡ | 18 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | BOT Zohan | 17 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | weirdhoney | 13 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Swag_Lured | 13 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | DnT | 10 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | You A QT ♡ | 1336 | 0.21 | 34 min |
| #2 | DnT | 1156 | 0.15 | 31 min |
| #3 | weirdhoney | 1144 | 0.16 | 30 min |
| #4 | Hugh Janus | 795 | 0.13 | 20 min |
| #5 | Swag_Lured | 726 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | You A QT ♡ | +1.41 | 84 | 66 |
| #2 | Hugh Janus | +1.35 | 81 | 66 |
| #3 | Neosavic | +1.17 | 78 | 68 |
| #4 | BeltFedBird | +0.93 | 64 | 55 |
| #5 | DnT | +0.65 | 67 | 62 |





