








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 638 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 96 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2395 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,007 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2255 | 38% |
| Smokes | 1271 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1032 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1449 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $671,737 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 472 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zei | 79% | 19 |
| #2 | SKRT | 76% | 33 |
| #3 | NIXU | 73% | 15 |
| #4 | matku | 70% | 46 |
| #5 | JMONEY2000 | 68% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | |ℬ| Count McX | 61% | 36 |
| #7 | Edu | 48% | 104 |
| #8 | NaabNipsu | 46% | 96 |
| #9 | Lihavakissa | 42% | 33 |
| #10 | Rinezki | 35% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Edu | 6 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Lihavakissa | 6 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | NaabNipsu | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | matku | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | |ℬ| Count McX | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Edu | 266 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #2 | Rinezki | 202 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #3 | matku | 199 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #4 | NaabNipsu | 161 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | SKRT | 108 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zei | +3.52 | 91 | 62 |
| #2 | SKRT | +1.59 | 86 | 60 |
| #3 | Lepi | +1.52 | 80 | 54 |
| #4 | matku | +1.16 | 77 | 79 |
| #5 | NIXU | +0.72 | 77 | 67 |





