








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 388 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3153 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,003 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1640 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2350 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 859 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 1154 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,027,790 of utility $261 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 412 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | McNutzz | 51% | 197 |
| #2 | Grizzlee | 50% | 241 |
| #3 | roma | 50% | 118 |
| #4 | dwubsly | 49% | 143 |
| #5 | 𝔹𝕦𝕟𝕘𝕖𝕣 🅼 | 48% | 160 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | naonao | 41% | 29 |
| #8 | Burger | 41% | 54 |
| #9 | Urlll | 40% | 25 |
| #10 | KennyAss | 40% | 35 |
| #11 | Sherp | 28% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grizzlee | 22 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | 𝔹𝕦𝕟𝕘𝕖𝕣 🅼 | 17 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | Burger | 13 | 0.0116 |
| #4 | McNutzz | 12 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | dwubsly | 9 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Urlll | +4.62 | 90 | 65 |
| #2 | McNutzz | +1.30 | 56 | 63 |
| #3 | dwubsly | +1.00 | 57 | 59 |
| #4 | Sherp | +0.78 | 57 | 55 |
| #5 | Burger | +0.54 | 67 | 71 |





