








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
676 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,354 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 384 | 16% |
| Smokes | 690 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 593 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 687 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $98,739 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | WoodZcope | 61% | 18 |
| #7 | bread enjoyer | 60% | 10 |
| #8 | FAKE | 57% | 7 |
| #9 | Winston the Pooh | 50% | 4 |
| #10 | quuqeli | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WoodZcope | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Ag3NtK | 1 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | breadmaker85 | 1 | 0.0122 |
| #4 | Winston the Pooh | 1 | 0.0133 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WoodZcope | 69 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #2 | Ag3NtK | 61 | 0.29 | 1 min |
| #3 | Rafex78 | 40 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #4 | bread enjoyer | 19 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #5 | quuqeli | 18 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Winston the Pooh | +4.47 | 88 | 63 |
| #2 | bread enjoyer | +1.75 | 85 | 69 |
| #3 | Rafex78 | +1.26 | 82 | 73 |
| #4 | Kalle | +0.84 | 75 | 56 |
| #5 | Duuggen LFT | +0.84 | 97 | 68 |





