








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 144 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 59 matches | ||
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1540 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,288 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1328 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1044 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 915 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1001 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $352,265 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 89 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ded Zeppelin | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | juchemz | 58% | 19 |
| #3 | satrams | 56% | 34 |
| #4 | soup bud | 55% | 31 |
| #5 | Ikgrid | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Ikgrid | 50% | 10 |
| #6 | GCSChris | 49% | 162 |
| #7 | spencer | 48% | 33 |
| #8 | Asa | 48% | 56 |
| #9 | Van Dinner | 33% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GCSChris | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | Asa | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Van Dinner | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GCSChris | 536 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #2 | satrams | 210 | 0.30 | 6 min |
| #3 | spencer | 181 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #4 | Asa | 146 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | Van Dinner | 133 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | satrams | +2.56 | 78 | 74 |
| #2 | Cpt. Ohee | +1.77 | 90 | 57 |
| #3 | spencer | +0.82 | 58 | 75 |
| #4 | Asa | +0.08 | 66 | 55 |
| #5 | GCSChris | +0.04 | 77 | 57 |





