








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 825 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 974 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 133 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8799 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,447 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5021 | 15% |
| Smokes | 8212 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 8119 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 11095 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,754,305 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2749 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flomp._. | 55% | 139 |
| #2 | RALPH NIGGUM | 54% | 191 |
| #3 | HENDO | 52% | 107 |
| #4 | WiggyM8 | 48% | 99 |
| #5 | LGTBQCentralCee | 48% | 458 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | HENDO | 52% | 107 |
| #4 | WiggyM8 | 48% | 99 |
| #5 | LGTBQCentralCee | 48% | 458 |
| #6 | ✪ F3AR | 48% | 269 |
| #7 | Randy | 45% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LGTBQCentralCee | 20 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | WiggyM8 | 12 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | ✪ F3AR | 11 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Flomp._. | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | RALPH NIGGUM | 7 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LGTBQCentralCee | 571 | 0.06 | 14 min |
| #2 | WiggyM8 | 415 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #3 | RALPH NIGGUM | 240 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #4 | Flomp._. | 205 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | ✪ F3AR | 109 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Randy | +2.98 | 84 | 41 |
| #2 | ✪ F3AR | +1.91 | 93 | 32 |
| #3 | LGTBQCentralCee | +1.78 | 73 | 54 |
| #4 | Flomp._. | +1.32 | 61 | 43 |
| #5 | RALPH NIGGUM | +1.00 | 70 | 47 |





