








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 490 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Wingman | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3795 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,585 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1573 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2295 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2564 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2153 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,285,620 of utility $189 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 228 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Angbwa | 65% | 65 |
| #2 | CREAM | 62% | 42 |
| #3 | Leon! | 57% | 28 |
| #4 | DDOUBLEE | 53% | 32 |
| #5 | Bolton | 52% | 210 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bolton | 46 | 0.0117 |
| #2 | Trilted | 11 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | | Mini | the swag boi | 10 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | SJA | 7 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | CREAM | 5 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bolton | 386 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #2 | | Mini | the swag boi | 214 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | Trilted | 183 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Angbwa | 156 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | Pitton | 114 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Angbwa | +7.38 | 88 | 73 |
| #2 | Bolton | +4.13 | 88 | 49 |
| #3 | CREAM | +2.25 | 81 | 47 |
| #4 | bond | +1.70 | 73 | 61 |
| #5 | SJA | +0.79 | 79 | 45 |





