








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 326 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 319 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 165 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9643 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,521 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2975 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3489 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2537 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3520 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,591,380 of utility $270 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 59 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Deranker | 58% | 45 |
| #2 | Lєєνуу | 56% | 43 |
| #3 | leo | 54% | 114 |
| #4 | Criss de ptit batte | 52% | 130 |
| #5 | Lare | 49% | 197 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Criss de ptit batte | 52% | 130 |
| #5 | Lare | 49% | 197 |
| #6 | MOFO | 46% | 35 |
| #7 | lil mosquito awper (adept) | 46% | 138 |
| #8 | Hyper | 44% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lil mosquito awper (adept) | 32 | 0.0135 |
| #2 | Lare | 16 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | Criss de ptit batte | 12 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | leo | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Deranker | 4 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lare | 435 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #2 | lil mosquito awper (adept) | 354 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | leo | 338 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | Deranker | 235 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #5 | Hyper | 194 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lil mosquito awper (adept) | +2.69 | 96 | 51 |
| #2 | Lare | +2.00 | 76 | 58 |
| #3 | Chicken | +0.99 | 91 | 48 |
| #4 | Deranker | +0.98 | 75 | 63 |
| #5 | leo | +0.90 | 69 | 52 |





