








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1882 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 901 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




162 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10075 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,469 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5882 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3749 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 9271 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 3567 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,880,531 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2008 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | roin | 50% | 108 |
| #2 | Janse | 48% | 106 |
| #3 | yoganilpferd | 48% | 674 |
| #4 | DerDude | 47% | 518 |
| #5 | Fire | 47% | 294 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yoganilpferd | 32 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | DerDude | 25 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | señor fefee<3 | 22 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | roin | 17 | 0.0077 |
| #5 | Boba und Tino ❤ | 8 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DerDude | 2147 | 0.20 | 64 min |
| #2 | yoganilpferd | 1789 | 0.13 | 43 min |
| #3 | Fire | 858 | 0.14 | 23 min |
| #4 | señor fefee<3 | 763 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #5 | Krulle | 667 | 0.30 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | roin | +3.26 | 85 | 45 |
| #2 | DerDude | +2.45 | 71 | 68 |
| #3 | Janse | +1.61 | 80 | 70 |
| #4 | yoganilpferd | +0.97 | 74 | 60 |
| #5 | Boba und Tino ❤ | +0.92 | 39 | 60 |





