








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 736 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 254 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 61 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3932 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,945 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2598 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2644 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3192 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2511 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,318,412 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 298 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | daily | 63% | 32 |
| #2 | Gaus | 57% | 194 |
| #3 | PauloYN | 55% | 67 |
| #4 | Toxiclainen | 52% | 31 |
| #5 | fAnthom | 42% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | PauloYN | 55% | 67 |
| #4 | Toxiclainen | 52% | 31 |
| #5 | fAnthom | 42% | 19 |
| #6 | tohu wabohu | 41% | 22 |
| #7 | machtnix. | 35% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gaus | 15 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | daily | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | fAnthom | 2 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | Toxiclainen | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | machtnix. | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gaus | 872 | 0.22 | 19 min |
| #2 | PauloYN | 298 | 0.22 | 8 min |
| #3 | daily | 132 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #4 | fAnthom | 46 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | machtnix. | 40 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | miro | +2.37 | 83 | 61 |
| #2 | daily | +1.47 | 93 | 67 |
| #3 | Gaus | +1.12 | 85 | 59 |
| #4 | machtnix. | +0.45 | 88 | 54 |
| #5 | tohu wabohu | +0.24 | 89 | 62 |





