








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1177 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 258 matches | ||
| Faceit | 176 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 183 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4700 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,348 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1690 | 15% |
| Smokes | 2939 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3452 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3267 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,400,300 of utility $224 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pry | Gismo | 54% | 83 |
| #2 | SidneyS | 54% | 89 |
| #3 | ᴾʳʸ MiratzZ | 53% | 396 |
| #4 | EroTec.™ | 53% | 104 |
| #5 | CURRY | 52% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ᴾʳʸ MiratzZ | 53% | 396 |
| #4 | EroTec.™ | 53% | 104 |
| #5 | CURRY | 52% | 27 |
| #6 | PinguinT | 50% | 48 |
| #7 | sh1rq | 49% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴾʳʸ MiratzZ | 19 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | EroTec.™ | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | SidneyS | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | sh1rq | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | Pry | Gismo | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴾʳʸ MiratzZ | 1441 | 0.17 | 47 min |
| #2 | EroTec.™ | 501 | 0.21 | 12 min |
| #3 | sh1rq | 278 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | SidneyS | 175 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | Pry | Gismo | 170 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴾʳʸ MiratzZ | +1.50 | 84 | 72 |
| #2 | 𝖛𝖊𝖎𝖘 | +0.56 | 77 | 46 |
| #3 | SidneyS | -0.05 | 78 | 61 |
| #4 | sh1rq | -0.49 | 59 | 67 |
| #5 | Pry | Gismo | -0.57 | 76 | 58 |





