








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 185 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 97 matches | ||
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2138 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,662 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2262 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1777 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1081 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1542 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $414,737 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ziigs | 65% | 62 |
| #2 | Chicken | 64% | 14 |
| #3 | Villamy | 63% | 16 |
| #4 | Chicken | 63% | 80 |
| #5 | Kn0ckz | 61% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | n0c- | 50% | 14 |
| #10 | Rinkui | 50% | 20 |
| #11 | T A K Y O N | 46% | 13 |
| #12 | πΎππ© | 42% | 19 |
| #13 | LITRULLY | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chicken | 6 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | THUG | 5 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | ziigs | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Villamy | 4 | 0.0144 |
| #5 | n0c- | 3 | 0.0109 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THUG | 243 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #2 | ziigs | 166 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | Nick Zutter | 155 | 0.46 | 5 min |
| #4 | Chicken | 126 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | Kn0ckz | 125 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THUG | +2.80 | 88 | 57 |
| #2 | Rinkui | +2.20 | 79 | 50 |
| #3 | Teddi | +1.69 | 80 | 58 |
| #4 | n0c- | +1.22 | 88 | 56 |
| #5 | πΎππ© | +1.17 | 79 | 72 |





