








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2385 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,945 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3087 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3195 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2436 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1227 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $540,057 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 76 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deca trt dose | 54% | 24 |
| #2 | The Substance | 51% | 37 |
| #3 | Xx$W@G_M3SS1AHxX | 51% | 228 |
| #4 | AWEM᠌ INUS | 48% | 159 |
| #5 | Yewcio | 42% | 113 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Substance | +4.83 | 81 | 64 |
| #2 | deca trt dose | +2.17 | 60 | 50 |
| #3 | Xx$W@G_M3SS1AHxX | +1.36 | 48 | 57 |
| #4 | Graph1c | +0.95 | 64 | 63 |
| #5 | Yewcio | +0.93 | 64 | 59 |





