








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 41 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 74 matches | ||
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3854 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,166 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4162 | 41% |
| Smokes | 2193 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1897 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1914 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $708,128 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 424 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Captain Average | 60% | 20 |
| #4 | Drugrabbit | 59% | 41 |
| #5 | Hokster4 | 55% | 113 |
| #6 | glu3 ♿ | 54% | 85 |
| #7 | Clarence | 51% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | glu3 ♿ | 211 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | Clarence | 138 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | Hokster4 | 135 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | bigboye | 108 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | Captain Average | 44 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Atlas | +2.61 | 82 | 65 |
| #2 | glu3 ♿ | +1.47 | 82 | 51 |
| #3 | Drugrabbit | +0.15 | 61 | 46 |
| #4 | bigboye | -0.15 | 63 | 53 |
| #5 | Clarence | -0.23 | 78 | 43 |





