








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 19 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Premier | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
987 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,939 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 471 | 24% |
| Smokes | 38 | 2% |
| HE Grenades | 644 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 786 | 41% |
Our logs show you have wasted $172,917 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ayati- | 34% | 32 |
| #5 | GOMA | 33% | 9 |
| #6 | purple | 32% | 19 |
| #7 | 筋肉CHINPOバトル | 31% | 13 |
| #8 | Zekamashi | 24% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Raincoat | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | ✪akaza | 1 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | 筋肉CHINPOバトル | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ayati- | 75 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #2 | Raincoat | 71 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | purple | 38 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | ✪akaza | 36 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | 筋肉CHINPOバトル | 30 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪akaza | +2.28 | 74 | 47 |
| #2 | 筋肉CHINPOバトル | +2.26 | 76 | 42 |
| #3 | GOMA | +2.23 | 59 | 50 |
| #4 | purple | +0.89 | 70 | 68 |
| #5 | Raincoat | +0.85 | 89 | 49 |





