








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 623 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 233 matches | ||
| Premier | 175 matches | ||
| Wingman | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5947 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,253 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8670 | 34% |
| Smokes | 8627 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2739 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 5217 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,423,111 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 198 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Figgy | 70% | 33 |
| #2 | shanomul | 59% | 41 |
| #3 | Dzd | 57% | 133 |
| #4 | Padge | 57% | 198 |
| #5 | Liam | 56% | 213 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Padge | 57% | 198 |
| #5 | Liam | 56% | 213 |
| #6 | sp00n | 55% | 339 |
| #7 | napG0D | 46% | 57 |
| #8 | Big C | 37% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sp00n | 12 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Liam | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Padge | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Big C | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | Dzd | 1 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sp00n | 1226 | 0.17 | 33 min |
| #2 | Padge | 679 | 0.17 | 16 min |
| #3 | Liam | 608 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #4 | Dzd | 247 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #5 | napG0D | 205 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cooLeR | +1.17 | 71 | 77 |
| #2 | Padge | +0.93 | 77 | 65 |
| #3 | Dzd | +0.64 | 82 | 54 |
| #4 | sp00n | +0.60 | 64 | 65 |
| #5 | Liam | -0.13 | 69 | 56 |





