










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 520 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 268 matches | ||
| Faceit | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3991 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,081 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3181 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3833 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3988 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3079 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,404,635 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 370 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LuckerKeks | 60% | 155 |
| #2 | M011i | 58% | 91 |
| #3 | Nille | 58% | 172 |
| #4 | Griffin Peter | 56% | 34 |
| #5 | FrogC | 55% | 300 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Pflaume | 54% | 154 |
| #7 | BobbyG | 52% | 122 |
| #8 | Noname | 48% | 108 |
| #9 | CarryPotter | 48% | 25 |
| #10 | Mussnoch Wiksen | 48% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LuckerKeks | 11 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | M011i | 9 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | BobbyG | 6 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Nille | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | FrogC | 4 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FrogC | 928 | 0.14 | 23 min |
| #2 | LuckerKeks | 761 | 0.23 | 18 min |
| #3 | Pflaume | 292 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | Noname | 281 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | BobbyG | 195 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meisterschütze | +2.94 | 75 | 61 |
| #2 | LuckerKeks | +1.84 | 58 | 65 |
| #3 | M011i | +1.07 | 77 | 41 |
| #4 | Griffin Peter | +0.40 | 60 | 56 |
| #5 | Nille | +0.01 | 56 | 54 |





