








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 64 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1100 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,897 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1237 | 32% |
| Smokes | 922 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 785 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 953 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $169,600 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | man327 | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | Halen | 72% | 18 |
| #3 | beasley | 71% | 70 |
| #4 | duhpe | 71% | 45 |
| #5 | ava | 67% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | beasley | 71% | 70 |
| #4 | duhpe | 71% | 45 |
| #5 | ava | 67% | 72 |
| #6 | .......... | 67% | 84 |
| #7 | jsfeltner cs.money | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .......... | 7 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | duhpe | 7 | 0.0075 |
| #3 | beasley | 4 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | ava | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Halen | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ava | 214 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | .......... | 211 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | beasley | 179 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | duhpe | 135 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | Halen | 40 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Halen | +4.07 | 81 | 62 |
| #2 | m i l o | +3.98 | 91 | 58 |
| #3 | beasley | +2.35 | 82 | 69 |
| #4 | .......... | +1.51 | 80 | 70 |
| #5 | man327 | +0.75 | 87 | 59 |





