








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 85 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 283 matches | ||
| Faceit | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




64 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5267 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,685 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4035 | 20% |
| Smokes | 5472 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 5528 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4650 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,073,183 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 53 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _MaRcO_510 | 63% | 30 |
| #2 | bop bandit | 54% | 74 |
| #3 | Creepy | 49% | 240 |
| #4 | IAMKUMA | 47% | 105 |
| #5 | Yolle:) | 46% | 197 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Creepy | 49% | 240 |
| #4 | IAMKUMA | 47% | 105 |
| #5 | Yolle:) | 46% | 197 |
| #6 | Chara (GR) | 45% | 95 |
| #7 | Sloop | 32% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Creepy | 28 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | bop bandit | 10 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | Yolle:) | 9 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | IAMKUMA | 9 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | Chara (GR) | 5 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yolle:) | 277 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #2 | IAMKUMA | 249 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | Creepy | 235 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #4 | Chara (GR) | 158 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | bop bandit | 99 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Creepy | +2.49 | 84 | 44 |
| #2 | _MaRcO_510 | +1.20 | 59 | 63 |
| #3 | Chara (GR) | +0.48 | 84 | 49 |
| #4 | FLACKO NASTY | +0.35 | 76 | 67 |
| #5 | IAMKUMA | -0.15 | 79 | 59 |





