








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 496 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 239 matches | ||
| Faceit | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 83 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3017 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,110 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1124 | 11% |
| Smokes | 3337 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 3020 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2629 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,160,192 of utility $243 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ellemose | 54% | 24 |
| #2 | Drasun | 53% | 30 |
| #3 | ChrisFD | 52% | 31 |
| #4 | DoubleU | 50% | 86 |
| #5 | Jaxon ll | 48% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | JackieLafon | 43% | 28 |
| #13 | Sherman | 39% | 38 |
| #14 | FAdy200 | 39% | 28 |
| #15 | Johnny_ | 38% | 45 |
| #16 | EstebanC | 36% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dora the Explorer | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | DoubleU | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | Unskilled_For3ver | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | EstebanC | 2 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | Wenglos | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wenglos | 178 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | MaDzilla | 173 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | CapToon | 129 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | Dora the Explorer | 123 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | Johnny_ | 117 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johnny_ | +3.17 | 64 | 63 |
| #2 | Jaxon ll | +2.54 | 55 | 53 |
| #3 | DoubleU | +1.72 | 72 | 50 |
| #4 | CapToon | +0.95 | 54 | 66 |
| #5 | Sherman | +0.73 | 71 | 52 |





