








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 367 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 78 matches | ||
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2089 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,341 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1249 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1490 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1506 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1096 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $576,708 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | temesta | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Strana | 75% | 20 |
| #3 | Narska | 71% | 21 |
| #4 | eple | 67% | 9 |
| #5 | iumi | 62% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #17 | Malmin Walde | 50% | 10 |
| #18 | E-urheilu☂Aqua | 50% | 12 |
| #19 | LENNART | 48% | 31 |
| #20 | traske | 44% | 9 |
| #21 | Pepperbeef | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g0ldyy | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | Strana | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | Jockez | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Snopinen | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | iumi | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g0ldyy | 563 | 0.31 | 19 min |
| #2 | Jouni | 140 | 0.28 | 3 min |
| #3 | LENNART | 113 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | Jockez | 91 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | hrh | 87 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bluric | +2.58 | 73 | 61 |
| #2 | LENNART | +1.64 | 73 | 68 |
| #3 | Strana | +1.53 | 60 | 71 |
| #4 | HalE | +1.46 | 80 | 39 |
| #5 | Jouni | +1.45 | 73 | 66 |





