








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 183 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2215 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,290 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2091 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1840 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1885 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1474 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $450,104 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 22 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VraM | 68% | 74 |
| #2 | VelTroX | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | EFFiciencY | 63% | 38 |
| #4 | Timmeh | 52% | 29 |
| #5 | xFloXii | 50% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Timmeh | 52% | 29 |
| #5 | xFloXii | 50% | 12 |
| #6 | Roberto ಠ_ಠ | 46% | 35 |
| #7 | Grobidumm | 42% | 38 |
| #8 | Tobes | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VraM | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | VelTroX | 2 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | EFFiciencY | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Roberto ಠ_ಠ | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Timmeh | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roberto ಠ_ಠ | 133 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #2 | EFFiciencY | 96 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | VraM | 95 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | Timmeh | 88 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #5 | Tobes | 53 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VelTroX | +4.23 | 88 | 63 |
| #2 | xFloXii | +3.21 | 93 | 64 |
| #3 | Câptaín™ ツ | +1.25 | 88 | 59 |
| #4 | Roberto ಠ_ಠ | +1.10 | 82 | 70 |
| #5 | EFFiciencY | +1.07 | 85 | 56 |





