








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 439 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 297 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 42 matches | ||
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4141 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,620 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9750 | 35% |
| Smokes | 7434 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6644 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3792 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,354,091 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 379 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lonny | 51% | 61 |
| #2 | nuke_merik | 48% | 66 |
| #3 | Mr. Tojo | 48% | 116 |
| #4 | .#πΎππ πππππππππππ^ | 45% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lonny | 51% | 61 |
| #2 | nuke_merik | 48% | 66 |
| #3 | Mr. Tojo | 48% | 116 |
| #4 | .#πΎππ πππππππππππ^ | 45% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Tojo | 7 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | lonny | 4 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lonny | 237 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #2 | Mr. Tojo | 236 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | nuke_merik | 52 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | .#πΎππ πππππππππππ^ | 28 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lonny | +5.14 | 60 | 73 |
| #2 | Strawman Harrowback | +0.71 | 63 | 74 |
| #3 | .#πΎππ πππππππππππ^ | -1.58 | 26 | 56 |
| #4 | Mr. Tojo | -1.58 | 39 | 57 |
| #5 | nuke_merik | -2.94 | 37 | 39 |





