








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 794 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 377 matches | ||
| Premier | 217 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 107 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5855 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,240 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9171 | 28% |
| Smokes | 9952 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 5505 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 7612 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,165,889 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 341 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swägi | 63% | 107 |
| #2 | Litti | 55% | 231 |
| #3 | Tackleberry | 54% | 309 |
| #4 | Zippoo | 52% | 305 |
| #5 | KinnQ | 52% | 192 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Zippoo | 52% | 305 |
| #5 | KinnQ | 52% | 192 |
| #6 | keinä | 49% | 67 |
| #7 | L0lz | 49% | 193 |
| #8 | pLLU | 47% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tackleberry | 6 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | L0lz | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Zippoo | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | KinnQ | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Swägi | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zippoo | 1136 | 0.18 | 28 min |
| #2 | Tackleberry | 722 | 0.11 | 16 min |
| #3 | Swägi | 553 | 0.24 | 14 min |
| #4 | KinnQ | 510 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #5 | Litti | 498 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Litti | +2.88 | 77 | 63 |
| #2 | Swägi | +2.04 | 69 | 72 |
| #3 | Tackleberry | +2.01 | 70 | 63 |
| #4 | ibu | +0.96 | 77 | 74 |
| #5 | Zippoo | -0.73 | 50 | 70 |





