








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 255 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 195 matches | ||
| Wingman | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2059 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,786 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2802 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2152 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2449 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2383 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $890,740 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swägi | 64% | 33 |
| #2 | Litti | 58% | 97 |
| #3 | Tackleberry | 55% | 152 |
| #4 | Zippoo | 54% | 157 |
| #5 | pLLU | 53% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tackleberry | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | L0lz | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Zippoo | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | ibu | 1 | 0.0002 |
| #5 | pLLU | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ibu | 935 | 0.22 | 27 min |
| #2 | Zippoo | 645 | 0.19 | 17 min |
| #3 | Tackleberry | 376 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #4 | keinä | 251 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | Litti | 219 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Litti | +3.75 | 78 | 68 |
| #2 | Swägi | +2.79 | 70 | 78 |
| #3 | Tackleberry | +2.65 | 72 | 61 |
| #4 | ibu | +0.30 | 74 | 79 |
| #5 | L0lz | +0.10 | 73 | 75 |





