








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 119 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Esplay | 3 matches | 1,827 | |
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
515 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,162 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 583 | 27% |
| Smokes | 571 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 443 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 565 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $176,295 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bobby Brown | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | Klaws | 64% | 14 |
| #3 | yonker | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | Tompa | 60% | 5 |
| #5 | Huke | 56% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | yonker | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | Tompa | 60% | 5 |
| #5 | Huke | 56% | 9 |
| #6 | KEN | 55% | 11 |
| #7 | rob | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Klaws | 40 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #2 | rob | 34 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #3 | Huke | 27 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #4 | yonker | 26 | 0.30 | 1 min |
| #5 | KEN | 24 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | h1atus | +1.03 | 78 | 56 |
| #2 | Tompa | +0.45 | 69 | 66 |
| #3 | rob | +0.32 | 79 | 73 |
| #4 | yonker | +0.15 | 39 | 63 |
| #5 | KEN | +0.04 | 63 | 71 |





