








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 127 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1366 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,628 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2499 | 54% |
| Smokes | 390 | 8% |
| HE Grenades | 689 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1050 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $361,077 of utility $76 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 287 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | detox spaceout | 14 | 0.0110 |
| #2 | mentally stable (they/them) | 5 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | S7VEN乡 | 4 | 0.0116 |
| #4 | 𝕯eTox freakbob | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | £RMĄĆ | 2 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | detox spaceout | 163 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | [ILF] JonBork | 152 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #3 | mentally stable (they/them) | 102 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #4 | 𝕯eTox freakbob | 85 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | £RMĄĆ | 55 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mentally stable (they/them) | +9.45 | 84 | 61 |
| #2 | S7VEN乡 | +8.58 | 87 | 69 |
| #3 | [ILF] JonBork | +5.84 | 79 | 52 |
| #4 | [ILF] BigCorn | +3.13 | 71 | 51 |
| #5 | RODBUSTER | +1.45 | 58 | 60 |





