








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 8 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 56 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
969 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,594 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1374 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1225 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 956 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1039 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $211,989 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Viaschivan | 54% | 52 |
| #2 | aim4 | 53% | 66 |
| #3 | [D] [M] [W] | 51% | 68 |
| #4 | N3um30 | 50% | 72 |
| #5 | Snajaa | 46% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Viaschivan | 54% | 52 |
| #2 | aim4 | 53% | 66 |
| #3 | [D] [M] [W] | 51% | 68 |
| #4 | N3um30 | 50% | 72 |
| #5 | Snajaa | 46% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aim4 | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | Viaschivan | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [D] [M] [W] | 310 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #2 | aim4 | 308 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #3 | N3um30 | 261 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #4 | Snajaa | 182 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | Viaschivan | 165 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LuNat1C | +1.95 | 82 | 73 |
| #2 | N3um30 | -0.08 | 57 | 79 |
| #3 | Snajaa | -0.45 | 64 | 77 |
| #4 | [D] [M] [W] | -0.73 | 42 | 75 |
| #5 | aim4 | -0.97 | 51 | 77 |





