










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 20 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 101 matches | ||
| Premier | 88 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1898 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,261 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1687 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1783 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1220 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1571 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,081,437 of utility $228 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 287 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Casper | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | -Hayden | 70% | 46 |
| #3 | ₒ ₓ ₔ | 62% | 55 |
| #4 | freq | 57% | 112 |
| #5 | Brcly | 49% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | -Hayden | 70% | 46 |
| #3 | ₒ ₓ ₔ | 62% | 55 |
| #4 | freq | 57% | 112 |
| #5 | Brcly | 49% | 63 |
| #6 | Lexy - Lil Nasty | 45% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brcly | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | ₒ ₓ ₔ | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | freq | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | -Hayden | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Casper | 1 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | freq | 240 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #2 | Brcly | 145 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | -Hayden | 141 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | ₒ ₓ ₔ | 125 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Lexy - Lil Nasty | 69 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Hayden | +1.96 | 75 | 70 |
| #2 | Casper | +1.77 | 85 | 58 |
| #3 | freq | +1.41 | 69 | 62 |
| #4 | ₒ ₓ ₔ | +0.66 | 72 | 72 |
| #5 | Lexy - Lil Nasty | +0.60 | 70 | 65 |





