








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 65 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 27 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
469 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,559 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 301 | 19% |
| Smokes | 446 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 255 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 557 | 36% |
Our logs show you have wasted $131,212 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 111 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ich bin Noah | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | Royal | 67% | 6 |
| #3 | CARNAG3 | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | Kepler | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | Perplex | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | TidusTacos | 40% | 10 |
| #7 | ⚡aben | 40% | 30 |
| #8 | Apollo | 40% | 30 |
| #9 | BananaMan | 31% | 13 |
| #10 | FLiiKR | 20% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⚡aben | 9 | 0.0147 |
| #2 | Apollo | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | BananaMan | 2 | 0.0077 |
| #4 | TidusTacos | 1 | 0.0143 |
| #5 | Perplex | 1 | 0.0161 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⚡aben | 166 | 0.27 | 4 min |
| #2 | Apollo | 67 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | FLiiKR | 42 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #4 | Ich bin Noah | 17 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #5 | Royal | 10 | 0.26 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Royal | +3.32 | 82 | 59 |
| #2 | Perplex | +3.18 | 77 | 65 |
| #3 | ⚡aben | +2.97 | 83 | 66 |
| #4 | FLiiKR | +1.93 | 88 | 74 |
| #5 | Kepler | +1.67 | 78 | 53 |





