








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 192 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 72 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
902 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,178 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 575 | 14% |
| Smokes | 1687 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 1095 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 821 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $245,108 of utility $57 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 261 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Windrammer | 45% | 20 |
| #2 | Kepler | 38% | 131 |
| #3 | ⚡aben | 37% | 203 |
| #4 | FLiiKR | 37% | 114 |
| #5 | Apollo | 36% | 200 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Kepler | 38% | 131 |
| #3 | ⚡aben | 37% | 203 |
| #4 | FLiiKR | 37% | 114 |
| #5 | Apollo | 36% | 200 |
| #6 | ADozingPanda | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⚡aben | 35 | 0.0086 |
| #2 | Apollo | 27 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | FLiiKR | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Kepler | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Windrammer | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⚡aben | 1122 | 0.28 | 26 min |
| #2 | FLiiKR | 464 | 0.20 | 12 min |
| #3 | Apollo | 437 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #4 | Kepler | 102 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #5 | ADozingPanda | 12 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FLiiKR | +5.74 | 87 | 77 |
| #2 | ⚡aben | +1.12 | 78 | 69 |
| #3 | Kepler | -0.33 | 64 | 48 |
| #4 | Apollo | -2.19 | 30 | 51 |
| #5 | BananaMan | -3.74 | 20 | 39 |





