








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 51 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
706 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,295 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 423 | 33% |
| Smokes | 106 | 8% |
| HE Grenades | 490 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 276 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $50,449 of utility $17 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 112 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Booyah | 45% | 11 |
| #2 | Sped Racer | 33% | 18 |
| #3 | Anakin Skinwalker | 33% | 21 |
| #4 | Doughboy | 33% | 21 |
| #5 | Refrigerator Resolution | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Sped Racer | 33% | 18 |
| #3 | Anakin Skinwalker | 33% | 21 |
| #4 | Doughboy | 33% | 21 |
| #5 | Refrigerator Resolution | 31% | 16 |
| #6 | TheDabFellows | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Refrigerator Resolution | 10 | 0.0295 |
| #2 | Doughboy | 5 | 0.0115 |
| #3 | Sped Racer | 2 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | Booyah | 2 | 0.0094 |
| #5 | Anakin Skinwalker | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anakin Skinwalker | 88 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #2 | Doughboy | 74 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #3 | Refrigerator Resolution | 67 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | Sped Racer | 52 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | TheDabFellows | 37 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Primerfalls | +5.81 | 34 | 21 |
| #2 | Sped Racer | +2.03 | 63 | 61 |
| #3 | Refrigerator Resolution | +1.39 | 79 | 58 |
| #4 | Booyah | +0.54 | 60 | 38 |
| #5 | Anakin Skinwalker | +0.24 | 80 | 58 |





