








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 721 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 146 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2545 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,623 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 413 | 4% |
| Smokes | 3340 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 2300 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3570 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,379,418 of utility $277 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 81 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Zuxin | 39% | 28 |
| #13 | buubibi | 39% | 247 |
| #14 | Xerox1065 | 37% | 195 |
| #15 | Piippo | 37% | 97 |
| #16 | Perkhele | 34% | 132 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | buubibi | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Xerox1065 | 8 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Ninygo | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Perkhele | 7 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Piippo | 4 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | buubibi | 1061 | 0.21 | 31 min |
| #2 | Xerox1065 | 569 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #3 | Piippo | 311 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #4 | Ninygo | 265 | 0.05 | 8 min |
| #5 | Perkhele | 223 | 0.08 | 6 min |





