








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 607 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 181 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 167 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4101 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,345 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2193 | 18% |
| Smokes | 3231 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3794 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3127 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,425,576 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 287 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jesko / fjk_do | 55% | 40 |
| #2 | Neunard | 54% | 114 |
| #3 | Hahnenkampf | 53% | 30 |
| #4 | DieTer HacKing :> | 53% | 98 |
| #5 | thubn :> | 52% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | DieTer HacKing :> | 53% | 98 |
| #5 | thubn :> | 52% | 21 |
| #6 | Hiqqz | 48% | 206 |
| #7 | TILTnas | 47% | 313 |
| #8 | ✪N3r0-sama | 39% | 109 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TILTnas | 25 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Hiqqz | 22 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | Neunard | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | ✪N3r0-sama | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | DieTer HacKing :> | 4 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DieTer HacKing :> | 264 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #2 | Jesko / fjk_do | 227 | 0.30 | 7 min |
| #3 | Hiqqz | 225 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #4 | ✪N3r0-sama | 210 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | Neunard | 193 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hiqqz | +2.91 | 79 | 58 |
| #2 | Neunard | +2.42 | 85 | 63 |
| #3 | Jesko / fjk_do | +2.18 | 89 | 76 |
| #4 | TipS | +0.84 | 71 | 59 |
| #5 | DieTer HacKing :> | +0.16 | 63 | 69 |





