








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 509 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 178 matches | ||
| Premier | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3711 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,461 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3676 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3670 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2286 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2829 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,104,424 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 471 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hahnenkampf | 66% | 35 |
| #2 | future22 | 63% | 30 |
| #3 | Hello | 62% | 29 |
| #4 | Hiqqz | 59% | 116 |
| #5 | Nitschu | 58% | 199 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | gro | 56% | 174 |
| #10 | Toui | 56% | 138 |
| #11 | TipS | 54% | 114 |
| #12 | TILTnas | 49% | 146 |
| #13 | ✪N3r0-sama | 49% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TILTnas | 20 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | pain. | 13 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | Nitschu | 10 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Hiqqz | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | gro | 4 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nitschu | 976 | 0.23 | 27 min |
| #2 | gro | 559 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #3 | Jesko / fjk_do | 424 | 0.26 | 12 min |
| #4 | k0ti | 284 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| #5 | pain. | 271 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hiqqz | +3.11 | 77 | 51 |
| #2 | Neunard | +1.58 | 87 | 65 |
| #3 | Jesko / fjk_do | +1.47 | 85 | 78 |
| #4 | Nitschu | +1.43 | 80 | 75 |
| #5 | TipS | +0.74 | 68 | 59 |





