








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1611 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 575 matches | ||
| Premier | 72 matches | ||
| Esplay | 21 matches | 2,137 | |
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 161 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8222 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 45,291 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12789 | 28% |
| Smokes | 10761 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 11408 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 10333 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,355,907 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1142 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flippad1337 | 66% | 38 |
| #2 | Rekanized | 60% | 43 |
| #3 | Svärd9 | 57% | 47 |
| #4 | Tobbe Den Korte | 57% | 188 |
| #5 | ze! | 53% | 257 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | NLY | 52% | 219 |
| #8 | brize #2 | 51% | 386 |
| #9 | Pl4yGround | 50% | 301 |
| #10 | GAL1L30 | 50% | 76 |
| #11 | DBS | 45% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brize #2 | 3 | 0.0003 |
| #2 | Peace | 2 | 0.0003 |
| #3 | ze! | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | Tobbe Den Korte | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | DBS | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brize #2 | 1288 | 0.15 | 41 min |
| #2 | Pl4yGround | 547 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #3 | Peace | 467 | 0.07 | 12 min |
| #4 | NLY | 434 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #5 | ze! | 408 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tobbe Den Korte | +2.02 | 81 | 48 |
| #2 | Pl4yGround | +0.97 | 73 | 65 |
| #3 | Cayeen | +0.60 | 69 | 83 |
| #4 | brize #2 | +0.28 | 67 | 79 |
| #5 | ze! | -0.13 | 75 | 57 |





