








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 490 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 503 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 103 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3776 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,023 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4844 | 20% |
| Smokes | 7602 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 6403 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 5174 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,871,280 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 808 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rekanized | 64% | 36 |
| #2 | Tobbe Den Korte | 55% | 187 |
| #3 | ze! | 54% | 276 |
| #4 | brize #2 | 52% | 411 |
| #5 | Cayeen | 52% | 284 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Pl4yGround | 52% | 422 |
| #7 | Dumhorfittnacke | 50% | 28 |
| #8 | GAL1L30 | 50% | 70 |
| #9 | NLY | 50% | 219 |
| #10 | DBS | 43% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brize #2 | 3 | 0.0003 |
| #2 | Cayeen | 3 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | Pl4yGround | 2 | 0.0002 |
| #4 | Tobbe Den Korte | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | NLY | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brize #2 | 1251 | 0.14 | 40 min |
| #2 | Cayeen | 939 | 0.15 | 23 min |
| #3 | Pl4yGround | 736 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #4 | NLY | 392 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #5 | ze! | 388 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tobbe Den Korte | +1.97 | 80 | 41 |
| #2 | Pl4yGround | +0.97 | 72 | 63 |
| #3 | ze! | +0.46 | 76 | 62 |
| #4 | brize #2 | +0.44 | 70 | 79 |
| #5 | Cayeen | +0.32 | 69 | 82 |





