








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 228 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 155 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Esplay | 4 matches | 1,747 | |
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2709 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,246 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2025 | 18% |
| Smokes | 3726 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 3057 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2438 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $820,978 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 341 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Haze | 69% | 26 |
| #2 | Söderström | 59% | 137 |
| #3 | Palm | 58% | 228 |
| #4 | Manne | 58% | 59 |
| #5 | aaaaaaaaaaboom | 56% | 194 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Palm | 13 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Söderström | 11 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | aaaaaaaaaaboom | 10 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Lotion | 6 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | Manne | 4 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aaaaaaaaaaboom | 513 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #2 | Palm | 273 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #3 | Söderström | 237 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | Manne | 100 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Kurt Caz | 80 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Palm | +2.50 | 90 | 56 |
| #2 | Söderström | +1.80 | 75 | 63 |
| #3 | Haze | +1.76 | 78 | 60 |
| #4 | Kurt Caz | +1.31 | 78 | 69 |
| #5 | aaaaaaaaaaboom | +1.06 | 81 | 65 |





