








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 793 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 471 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 140 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6039 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,767 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4967 | 18% |
| Smokes | 6316 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 8139 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 8345 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,122,302 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1149 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | carryme | 50% | 256 |
| #9 | AthenA 死鬼 | 49% | 551 |
| #10 | Crazex | 47% | 137 |
| #11 | Lady_dark* | 44% | 94 |
| #12 | ilchev | 43% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AthenA 死鬼 | 23 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Hasserfülltes Verhalten | 10 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | carryme | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | ProstoVisq | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | FrenZy | 5 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AthenA 死鬼 | 1105 | 0.10 | 25 min |
| #2 | ProstoVisq | 720 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #3 | carryme | 421 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #4 | Hasserfülltes Verhalten | 276 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #5 | FrenZy | 225 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FrenZy | +4.93 | 91 | 67 |
| #2 | ProstoVisq | +2.83 | 71 | 55 |
| #3 | sukune | +2.80 | 91 | 61 |
| #4 | Hasserfülltes Verhalten | +2.75 | 77 | 50 |
| #5 | F[A]ll3n[A]nG3L | +2.14 | 75 | 45 |





