








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 624 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 71 matches | ||
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3908 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,587 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5820 | 40% |
| Smokes | 3698 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1908 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 3161 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $622,533 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 730 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | loax | 58% | 26 |
| #8 | fght ff yr dmns | 57% | 81 |
| #9 | Mais | 56% | 18 |
| #10 | TPaen | 56% | 45 |
| #11 | Rhy Cookra | 52% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ODG LUSIDD | 25 | 0.0219 |
| #2 | Saintz | 13 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | LiquifiedSnowman | 11 | 0.0069 |
| #4 | finite | 10 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | fght ff yr dmns | 8 | 0.0051 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | finite | 524 | 0.32 | 16 min |
| #2 | Saintz | 359 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | LiquifiedSnowman | 327 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #4 | fght ff yr dmns | 171 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | TPaen | 146 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mikey | +4.07 | 81 | 68 |
| #2 | Saintz | +2.84 | 82 | 48 |
| #3 | finite | +2.81 | 81 | 71 |
| #4 | ODG LUSIDD | +0.57 | 86 | 44 |
| #5 | LiquifiedSnowman | +0.54 | 71 | 56 |





