








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 485 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 196 matches | ||
| Faceit | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2625 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,506 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4736 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3464 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2617 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3689 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $518,031 of utility $89 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 381 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomp | 71% | 51 |
| #2 | nasse | 69% | 16 |
| #3 | AkAntA | 64% | 25 |
| #4 | Rake | 63% | 27 |
| #5 | Kyliys | 61% | 117 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Saerki | 58% | 45 |
| #9 | Kuskinen | 54% | 71 |
| #10 | Santtuust | 53% | 58 |
| #11 | Maikuul | 52% | 33 |
| #12 | ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ MONSTERI | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kyliys | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Santtuust | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | tomp | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Maikuul | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | RK | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kyliys | 725 | 0.31 | 18 min |
| #2 | tomp | 235 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #3 | Kuskinen | 226 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | Maikuul | 148 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| #5 | Santtuust | 147 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rake | +4.30 | 76 | 70 |
| #2 | nasse | +4.19 | 86 | 76 |
| #3 | tomp | +1.18 | 47 | 82 |
| #4 | Kyliys | +0.95 | 61 | 70 |
| #5 | äkäne | +0.83 | 66 | 62 |





