








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 410 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 145 matches | ||
| Faceit | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3361 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,391 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2345 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2867 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2461 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1718 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $926,371 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 102 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AkAntA | 67% | 24 |
| #2 | Maikuul | 63% | 56 |
| #3 | Santtuust | 61% | 112 |
| #4 | Rake | 60% | 48 |
| #5 | Tum3 | 59% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | ILIAS * Coca-Cola® | 48% | 25 |
| #14 | Tuopii | 46% | 24 |
| #15 | ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ MONSTERI | 44% | 25 |
| #16 | z00ze | 43% | 23 |
| #17 | masqutti | 39% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kyliys | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Kuskinen | 7 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | tomp | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Santtuust | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Herppa | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kyliys | 961 | 0.28 | 23 min |
| #2 | tomp | 577 | 0.29 | 17 min |
| #3 | Kuskinen | 477 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #4 | Herppa | 348 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #5 | Santtuust | 342 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rake | +3.71 | 82 | 69 |
| #2 | nasse | +2.39 | 86 | 80 |
| #3 | ILIAS * Coca-Cola® | +2.26 | 63 | 68 |
| #4 | ville1 | +1.87 | 75 | 79 |
| #5 | Tum3 | +0.92 | 80 | 64 |





