








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 258 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 229 matches | ||
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3402 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,790 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2881 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3342 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2703 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1864 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $752,460 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 976 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | muki | 59% | 22 |
| #2 | cArma. | 58% | 113 |
| #3 | Krargobus [M] | 55% | 22 |
| #4 | Ynnej | 53% | 89 |
| #5 | rass | 51% | 156 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cArma. | 9 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Ynnej | 6 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | SoloGrind | 3 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | rass | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | ErkkiT | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cArma. | 218 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #2 | rass | 173 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #3 | Ynnej | 104 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | ErkkiT | 89 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | SoloGrind | 79 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SoloGrind | +3.77 | 84 | 64 |
| #2 | cArma. | +3.49 | 78 | 68 |
| #3 | Krargobus [M] | +0.63 | 83 | 46 |
| #4 | ErkkiT | +0.41 | 50 | 62 |
| #5 | Ynnej | +0.07 | 55 | 69 |





