








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 520 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 81 matches | ||
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4966 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,511 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4083 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3667 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2299 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 3462 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,078,414 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 190 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skaproodle | 91% | 33 |
| #2 | N1TE ⛟ | 90% | 48 |
| #3 | puborkiazxc | 88% | 49 |
| #4 | Inzane | 86% | 166 |
| #5 | ImpressioN- #A | 84% | 342 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Derek | 80% | 46 |
| #8 | Cammy | 79% | 66 |
| #9 | splashske | 78% | 46 |
| #10 | LoneWolfz07 | 71% | 93 |
| #11 | hash | 62% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ImpressioN- #A | 11 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Cammy | 7 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | chΰbbi☻ | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Derek | 5 | 0.0060 |
| #5 | Inzane | 4 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ImpressioN- #A | 1772 | 0.29 | 55 min |
| #2 | Inzane | 690 | 0.24 | 21 min |
| #3 | chΰbbi☻ | 534 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #4 | Cammy | 367 | 0.30 | 8 min |
| #5 | LoneWolfz07 | 317 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ImpressioN- #A | +6.13 | 85 | 84 |
| #2 | splashske | +3.81 | 93 | 60 |
| #3 | Kuma - 熊 | +3.58 | 82 | 67 |
| #4 | Inzane | +3.03 | 80 | 70 |
| #5 | Derek | +2.39 | 88 | 67 |





