








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2613 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 485 matches | ||
| Premier | 338 matches | ||
| Esplay | 40 matches | 1,989 | |
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 90 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11556 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 44,447 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10560 | 24% |
| Smokes | 11288 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 12441 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 10158 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,841,805 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1415 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mange | 62% | 189 |
| #2 | +w ぷ PREDICTYOURPATH | 60% | 67 |
| #3 | wAA1L | 59% | 93 |
| #4 | hormuki | 58% | 151 |
| #5 | Sebz | 57% | 181 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Nero | 53% | 124 |
| #10 | jonkajibb | 53% | 135 |
| #11 | VolvoRider | 51% | 76 |
| #12 | sauronlol | 50% | 121 |
| #13 | koel | 48% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stack Overdog | 12 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | Wikn3R🐼 | 9 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | sauronlol | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | VolvoRider | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | jonkajibb | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stack Overdog | 3198 | 0.20 | 83 min |
| #2 | Wikn3R🐼 | 1169 | 0.15 | 35 min |
| #3 | hormuki | 641 | 0.19 | 18 min |
| #4 | Nero | 516 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #5 | jonkajibb | 328 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nALLEn☁ | +2.39 | 74 | 78 |
| #2 | wAA1L | +1.67 | 77 | 69 |
| #3 | hormuki | +1.20 | 77 | 69 |
| #4 | +w ぷ PREDICTYOURPATH | +0.90 | 79 | 57 |
| #5 | Nero | +0.63 | 74 | 77 |





