








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1162 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 528 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




52 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6512 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,790 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4551 | 18% |
| Smokes | 4756 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 8860 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 6623 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,257,612 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 302 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ProGuard2 | 50% | 563 |
| #2 | VareniŠāvēji MickeyM | 48% | 392 |
| #3 | QuinnDecim | 42% | 146 |
| #4 | Tālivaldis | 35% | 55 |
| #5 | ultimate_destroyer | 24% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ProGuard2 | 50% | 563 |
| #2 | VareniŠāvēji MickeyM | 48% | 392 |
| #3 | QuinnDecim | 42% | 146 |
| #4 | Tālivaldis | 35% | 55 |
| #5 | ultimate_destroyer | 24% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ProGuard2 | 64 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | VareniŠāvēji MickeyM | 14 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | QuinnDecim | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Tālivaldis | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ProGuard2 | 1809 | 0.15 | 44 min |
| #2 | VareniŠāvēji MickeyM | 378 | 0.05 | 11 min |
| #3 | QuinnDecim | 142 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #4 | ultimate_destroyer | 54 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Tālivaldis | 33 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Para EU | +2.06 | 65 | 66 |
| #2 | ProGuard2 | +1.58 | 69 | 69 |
| #3 | QuinnDecim | -3.71 | 21 | 41 |
| #4 | VareniŠāvēji MickeyM | -3.77 | 32 | 58 |
| #5 | Tālivaldis | -3.86 | 23 | 47 |





