








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 196 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 124 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2294 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,487 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1727 | 20% |
| Smokes | 2011 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2105 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2644 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $768,236 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 156 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vahe | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | -vahe モティゼ ロ | 61% | 84 |
| #3 | Kaccini | 60% | 30 |
| #4 | bröd | 58% | 43 |
| #5 | Antsu♕ | 57% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -vahe モティゼ ロ | 8 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Novoisaatana | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Lamppi | 5 | 0.0077 |
| #4 | Hedari | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Jayvola | 4 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Missing Link™ | +4.43 | 89 | 77 |
| #2 | jere | +3.38 | 86 | 67 |
| #3 | bröd | +3.23 | 82 | 49 |
| #4 | Vahe | +2.38 | 70 | 65 |
| #5 | Memoria | +2.19 | 90 | 58 |





