








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 347 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 162 matches | ||
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2606 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,344 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4081 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3104 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2989 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3170 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $609,527 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 67 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bröd | 58% | 57 |
| #2 | -vahe モティゼ ロ | 56% | 80 |
| #3 | Neophyte | 53% | 30 |
| #4 | Novoisaatana | 52% | 141 |
| #5 | jere | 51% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jere | +3.71 | 86 | 64 |
| #2 | -vahe モティゼ ロ | +2.54 | 82 | 69 |
| #3 | Kaccini | +2.29 | 79 | 61 |
| #4 | bröd | +2.14 | 78 | 48 |
| #5 | Khimera | +1.95 | 42 | 71 |





