








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 7 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 108 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1515 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,016 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 502 | 13% |
| Smokes | 878 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1450 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 1186 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $473,463 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Relapse | 49% | 51 |
| #2 | R3vak | 48% | 147 |
| #3 | Phil | 45% | 29 |
| #4 | bot burns | 36% | 25 |
| #5 | Lé Pasty | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Relapse | 49% | 51 |
| #2 | R3vak | 48% | 147 |
| #3 | Phil | 45% | 29 |
| #4 | bot burns | 36% | 25 |
| #5 | Lé Pasty | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R3vak | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Phil | 3 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | Relapse | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | bot burns | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Lé Pasty | 1 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R3vak | 800 | 0.26 | 18 min |
| #2 | Relapse | 201 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #3 | Phil | 14 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #4 | Lé Pasty | 8 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | bot burns | 2 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Relapse | +3.82 | 66 | 67 |
| #2 | RoosterRhith | +1.12 | 62 | 49 |
| #3 | Phil | +0.58 | 69 | 43 |
| #4 | R3vak | -1.82 | 37 | 65 |
| #5 | Lé Pasty | -2.30 | 54 | 48 |





